Confessions of a Baby Vampire #5
Although it doesn't say it anywhere in the book, the main character in VAMPIRE BABY does have a name. He's named after my nephew, Devin. Devin, shares a common root with devil. No one would ever, ever call Devin a devil-child now--he's a top student, vice-president of his school, football player, all around nice guy--now, I say, because there was a time . . .
When my sis-in-law, Joanne, told me about Devin and "that time" she was called into the principal's office, I received the news with a mixture of relief and anxiety. After years of being the only "biter" (whispered from the side of their mouths from behind their hands, and with a shudder of disapproval) it was comforting in that misery-loves-company way to know I wasn't the only one. And a bit worrisome thinking it might be---cue the music dum-du-dum-dum-duhhhhhh-- in our blood.
A quick click through the internet (repository of all knowledge true and not) I'm not the only one worried that vampirism might be hereditary. According to an article from the Pravadaru Post, "Lee Eallis, a British physician, came up with a theory that linked the so-called vampires with porphyria, one of a group of rare inherited disorders due to disturbance of the metabolism of the breakdown product of the red blood pigment hemoglobin. In 1963, Eallis submitted his monograph titled On Porphyria and Etymology of Vampires to the Royal Society of Medicine."
So according to reports, a classmate named Casey "turned" Devin. It happened in Kindergarten, near the "house" corner or the "coloring" corner. Stories vary as to the location and time, as they do regarding the exact incantation Casey used to bring about Devin's transformation. All parties agree on one point. Consistently agreeable, smiley, all around good guy, Devin, turned around a sank his fangs into Casey's back. And when it was all over, even after being sent to the principal's office, even after the authorities were called, and threatened with expulsion and unimaginable punishment, Devin refused to repent. "You deserved it!" was his only defense.
I'll leave it to you to decide: Is biting a symptom of some rare inherited vampiric disorder or is it simply a matter of being a nice guys last resort?
One last word on the subject. This is Devin's family dog. His name is Mr. Fangles
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