#7 Fangs! Some Do and Some Don’t . . .

Further Confessions of a Baby Vampire #7

Long, sharp pointed fangs? Some biting babies have them, and some don't.

I don’t “tell” what I’m writing until I've written a solid draft. With VAMPIRE BABY it was different. For some reason—even when all I knew was the title—I needed to say it. It may have been my way of claiming it. “Dibs! Vampire Baby is my title! Mine!”

To my surprise, folks—lot of them—started sharing stories of their “vampire babies,” ie babies who cut their canines first. Which got me thinking about fangs: 

Which got me thinking about Mike Smith.

Mike was a nice guy. Cute, too,(even if he was a head shorter than I ever was). Except for his teeth. . . They were tiny, pointed and needle-sharp. Don’t bother looking for a man named Mike with teeth like that. You won’t find him. (At least not that Mike). Rumor has it, between junior and high school he had all his teeth yanked and got dentures.

And my 2-month-young, adorable grandbaby, Bennett. We do have that photo of him biting his dad. . . Could Bennett turn Vampire Baby? Is it hereditary???

Trying to keep a level head, I did a quick Internet search on fangs: 

I discovered that "Genes are estimated to account for about 70% of the variation in primary tooth development" (from 23andme.com).

So I kept clicking around. And while my internet search turned up a kazillion articles on teething and the order in which baby teeth "usually" erupt, I couldn't find anything about a genetic link.

And, I learned about a frightening genetic condition that can cause vampire fangs. It's called Congenital Ectodermal Dysplasia and results in "minimal to no growth of teeth in the mouth."  (From Tech E Blog). There were slews of articles on the subject. And photos: 

Further clicking turned up an article in Knoji Consumer Knowledge entitled  "The Genetics of Vampires":  which explains how Vampires are descended from a "genetically older form of human that had a higher DNA count from the beginning. . . at some point the human acquired an exogenous piece of DNA from a virus or another source. This piece of DNA could have then become the vampire DNA" who were, due to a hostile environment, forced to live underground and thus isolated evolved into Vampires. 

Now totally freaked, my laissez faire attitude squelched, I did what I should have done from the start and went to the real  experts: Moms!

With centuries of experience who has seen more teeth errupt? Who better to ask about the emergence--or not--of fangs?

A search on Circle of Moms blog  turned up a strand of mom comments longer than a double-helix discussing the order in which baby teeth erupt.

The consensus: "Relax. Don't worry about it. Fangs happen!

The "I Vant My Vampire Baby" Book Trailer Contest--is NOW!!! 

Here's how: View the Vampire Baby by Kelly Bennett book trailer on Youtube. Leave a comment. You're entered to win you're very own authographed copy of the book. It's that easy! 

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#6 I Was Aiming for the Wooden Spoon and Missed . . .

Confessions of a Kindergarten Vampire #6

Single mother of two before she was 22, my mother was what you politely call "strict." A staunch believer in the adage "spare the rod, spoil the child" any  weapon at hand--fly swatter, shoe, yard stick, wooden spoon--served as her "rod" when she was riled. Rather than heed warning and curb our mischievous ways, my brother and I hid the various weapons under the couch and carried on . . .

 While I do remember a repairman pulling out our gold vinyl couch and finding--to my mother's mortification--a grand assortment of "rods" hidden beneath it, I don't recall this episode. But everyone else in the family seems to. And it has always filled me with a sick sort of prideful remourse, so I'll share it here.  

The story goes that one Saturday afternoon, my mother was in the kitchen, whipping up a batch of pancakes, when my brother Joe, then about 3, committed some offense. While she was stirring and reprimanding, I crawled into the room, across the floor, and using her leg to steady myself, pulled up to a standing position, turned my face into her leg, opened wide and bit  down! And, she says, smiled while she cried and hollered for me to let go. . .  

The "I Vant My Vampire Baby" Book Trailer Contest--is NOW!!! 

Here's how: View the Vampire Baby by Kelly Bennett book trailer on Youtube. Leave a comment. You're entered to win you're very own authographed copy of the book. It's that easy! 

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#5 Is it . . . In The Blood?

Confessions of a Baby Vampire #5

Although it doesn't say it anywhere in the book, the main character in VAMPIRE BABY  does have a name. He's named after my nephew, Devin. Devin, shares a common root with devil. No one would ever, ever call Devin a devil-child now--he's a top student, vice-president of his school, football player, all around nice guy--now, I say, because there was a time . . . 

When my sis-in-law, Joanne, told me about Devin and "that time" she was called into the principal's office, I received the news with a mixture of relief and anxiety. After years of being the only "biter" (whispered from the side of their mouths from behind their hands, and with a shudder of disapproval) it was comforting in that misery-loves-company way to know I wasn't the only one. And a bit worrisome thinking it might be---cue the music dum-du-dum-dum-duhhhhhh-- in our blood.

A quick click through the internet (repository of all knowledge true and not) I'm not the only one worried that vampirism might be hereditary. According to an article from the Pravadaru Post, "Lee Eallis, a British physician, came up with a theory that linked the so-called vampires with porphyria, one of a group of rare inherited disorders due to disturbance of the metabolism of the breakdown product of the red blood pigment hemoglobin. In 1963, Eallis submitted his monograph titled On Porphyria and Etymology of Vampires to the Royal Society of Medicine."

So according to reports, a classmate named Casey "turned" Devin. It happened in Kindergarten, near the "house" corner or the "coloring" corner. Stories vary as to the location and time, as they do regarding the exact incantation Casey used to bring about Devin's transformation. All parties agree on one point. Consistently agreeable, smiley, all around good guy, Devin, turned around a sank his fangs into Casey's back. And when it was all over, even after being sent to the principal's office, even after the authorities were called, and threatened with expulsion and unimaginable punishment, Devin refused to repent. "You deserved it!" was his only defense. 

 I'll leave it to you to decide: Is biting a symptom of some rare inherited vampiric disorder or is it simply a matter of being a nice guys last resort?  

One last word on the subject. This is Devin's family dog. His name is Mr. Fangles

The "I Vant My Vampire Baby" Book Trailer Contest--is NOW!!! 

Here's how: View the Vampire Baby by Kelly Bennett book trailer on Youtube. Leave a comment. You're entered to win you're very own authographed copy of the book. It's that easy! 

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#4 I Didn't Mean to Hurt Him . . .

Confessions of a Baby Vampire #4

Oh the glee with which my mother relays baby vampire stories . . . I don't recall this every happening, can't imagine myself doing it, but, the story goes that my brother Joe love, love, loved his baby sister. And he loved to give me squeezes and lovies. One day, he bent close to do just that and CHOMP! I bit him, clamped down on his bottom lip and would not let go . . .

The "I Vant My Vampire Baby" Book Trailer Contest--is NOW!!! 

Here's how: View the Vampire Baby by Kelly Bennett book trailer on Youtube. Leave a comment. You're entered to win you're very own authographed copy of the book. It's that easy! 

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#3 Jerry Started It . . .

Confessions of a not-so-baby Vampire #3

Jerry, lived across from us in the next building. Mostly, Jerry was my brother's friend. Sometimes, Jerry was my friend, too. (Especially when they were bored.) One summer day, the three of us decided to run away. While Joe and Jerry stood guard, I sneaked in the kitchen and packed the lunchbox and we set off. We walked and walked for like a hundred miles. When starvation set it, we climbed into a massive sewer pipe section which had been left in a ravine. When I had to pee, the boys stood guard, I did they same for them--just in case we were being tracked by marauders. Along the way, we kept watch for bottles. (Back then bottles could be returned for a deposit of 5 or 10 cents). We found a few (maybe 2?) and stored them in the now empty lunch box, which we took turns carrying.  As dusk, we found ourselves near the grocery store. Rations depleted, we raced to the store to cash in our bottles. As it happened, I was holding the lunch box.  As we neared the entrance, Jerry tried to snatch the lunch box away from me, so . . . I  bit him.

The "I Vant My Vampire Baby" Book Trailer Contest--is NOW!!! 

Here's how: View the Vampire Baby by Kelly Bennett book trailer on Youtube. Leave a comment. You're entered to win you're very own authographed copy of the book. It's that easy! 

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#2 Her Favorite Food are Red, Blood-red . . .

Confessions of a Not-So Baby Vampire #2

Having lived all my 8 years near the strawberry fields of California--"The Fruit Bowl"  "Salad Bowl" or "Paradise" Nanny called it, depending on the season--moving to Pennsylvania, arriving Christmas Eve, in a blizzard, was . . .  an adjustment. My mom says my brother and I "cried because we couldn't go outside." (I think she's being a bit dramatic...) The sentiment was true enough. I especially missed the abondanza of fruit: red delicious (although mealy) apples, plump red plums, juicy red raspberries, and most of all, heaping crates of field-sweet strawberries so ripe the juices ran blood-red down my arm when I bit one.

So that first Easter in Pennsylvania, when mom surprised us with a fresh strawberry pie, well, who could blame me? 

After double-checking no one was near, I plucked a big red strawberry dripping with glaze from the back of the pie and ate it. 

Blood-red desire for more drove me to do something I knew I shouldn't.

I sneaked back into the fridge, plucked another strawberry out of the pie. Held it poised over my mouth and bit off the bottom. Then I tucked it back into the pie, stem side up. The glaze settled in nicely around it. None would have been the wiser if I'd stopped at one. But I didn't. Couldn't. Again and again I sneaked back for more.  

By the time it was served, the pie had shrunk in size by half.  I held my breath and hoped no one would notice. And they didn't seem to,  not until my mom served up the first slice and several bottomless strawberries tumbled out.

The "I Vant My Vampire Baby" Book Trailer Contest--is NOW!!! 

Here's how: View the Vampire Baby by Kelly Bennett book trailer on Youtube. Leave a comment. You're entered to win you're very own authographed copy of the book. It's that easy! 

Here are the Contest Details!  

#1 Confessions of a Baby Vampire

In keeping with the contest, daily--from Oct 15 thru 31st, I will post a true confession of a Vampire here on my blog, Kelly's Fishbowl. Please join the fun and share your Vampire Baby anecdotes. Enter the Contest as many times as you like--watch the trailer, post a comment, your entered to win! It's that easy!!!

Confession of a Baby Vampire #1 

I didn't have Vampire fangs. But I was a biter. I bit my big brother, Joe. I bit my mother. And one day, when my grandfather, Poppy, came to pick me up at school, he found my teacher in tears. Why? Because I bit and kicked her... Then I climbed to the top of the monkey bars I wouldn't come down . . .  

The "I Vant My Vampire Baby" Book Trailer Contest--is NOW!!! 

Here's how: View the Vampire Baby by Kelly Bennett book trailer on Youtube. Leave a comment. You're entered to win you're very own authographed copy of the book. It's that easy! 

Here are the Contest Details!  

An Anthor's Fear . . .

If a tree falls in the forest and noone is near, does it make a sound?

The question was first posed by Philosopher  George Berkeley, in A Treatise Concerning the Principles of Human Knowledge (pub. 1710). Here's the passage "But, say you, surely there is nothing easier than for me to imagine trees, for instance, in a park [...] and nobody by to perceive them. [...] 

In June 1883, in the magazineThe Chautauquan, the question was posed, "If a tree were to fall on an island where there were no human beings would there be any sound?"

The question was answered with an emphatic NO!

 "Sound is the sensation excited in the ear when the air or other medium is set in motion."[3] . In other words, if there is no ear near to hear it, there is no sound. 

If a book is published and nobody reads it? Then it is no book. 

Spoken or not, this is every author's fear. And we are a fearful lot: 

         First,  we fear we won't be able to tell our story . . . 

         Then,  we fear our story will never be published . . . 

         After, we fear no one will want to read our book. . .  

And in-between, before and after there are a byzillion other smaller fears... (Is it any wonder so many notable authors, as Mr. Bojangles put it,  "drinks a bit"?)

That's why I did it--4 am wake-ups, 3 flights, 6 hours drive--Why I went to Fenton, MO, where, thanks to Deborah, the Barnes and Noble Community Relation's Rep, and Rebecca Grose, my publicist, visited 6 schools, gave 6 school and 2 store presentations, to read. Read it I did. I read VAMPIRE BABY at least a dozen times, and NOT NORMAN, A Goldfish Story, too! 

What ohhhh, what a joyful time it was! 

What these pictures don't show is a couple hundred K-2nd graders, in all manner of costume and hair-do, eyes bright, shaking their fingers and shouting out "NO BITE!"

Music to my fearful author's ears!

The "I VANT MY VAMPIRE BABY" Contest begins Oct. 15. Enter to win!

Link: http://kellybennett.com/blog/2013/10/i-vant-my-vampire-baby-contest-details